Attractive or Distracting?

This week I had an interesting situation in which God taught me more about who He has made me to be. I must warn the reader, however, that this is quite out of the box for me, so bear with me.

I was unable to go to my normal hiding place on Wednesday afternoon right after bowling, so while I waiting for that space to be available, I went to an eating establishment to do some studying. As I entered the building, I ordered my food, located the fireplace where I was going to study, and notice a young man studying there as well. I thought "This will be great. I will be able to study knowing someone else is also studying, and that will motivate me to keep on task." Did I mention he was nice to look at? OK, so that would not have been a big problem at all for me, except for his choice of study...

I sat down, and in preparing to pray for my food, I noticed what he had in his lap for study. He was studying his Bible! As a woman of theology, and one with a ministry degree seeking a man who know's God's word, I was floored! When he was done with reading in the Bible, he then took out a systematic theology text, and began pouring over that as well. Oh, my heart was fluttering!

OK, so then I began to think about having sat down there, partially because there was an attractive man there, and partly to study. I realized that I really didn't want to be a distraction, especially to man who was studying God's word. Then as I was having this inner dialogue with God, He reminded me that I wanted to be noticed as attractive. I began to question Him about if that meant that I would be a distraction, which I have never been comfortable with. He reminded me that when my husband is attracted to me, he will be distracted from whatever he is doing, and I will be in the front of his mind. I'm still not fully OK with this, as I don't like drawing attention to myself (though if you know me, that's sometimes hard to avoid), but I think God is teaching me a valuable lesson about beauty.

As a woman, I am created to show forth the beauty of God. This beauty is one that catches the attention of all who witness it, just as my attention was captured in the midst of the Rocky Mountains, the aspens, and the lakes in the valleys. God is making me to be beauty that does draw the attention of those who witness my life, and though I never want to draw someone away from God, I want to be a woman that others see and say "Wow, God is so amazing! He has created such beauty!" I want my life to be all for the glory of my King!

So today, the aplication? Well, first of all, think about the things that distract you. Are they distracting because they are beautiful, or are they just mind-catchers to keep you distracted for the sake of distraction? Secondly, let God use your life to attract the attention of others to His beauty and glory. I'm still not sure how all this will pan out in my life, but I know I am more free to be me and let God shine through.

Well, it's off to the books. Talk to you all again soon.

The Scandal!

I am a firm believer that a woman should not initiate relational interactions with a man when it comes to romance. I do not want to be the leader in my marriage, and I will not set the pace that way by pursuing a relationship first. I realize this may mean I will never marry if there is no man who will approach me first, and that's all fine and good to me.

When I read the story of Ruth I am reminded that she had to take a step toward Boaz in order to call him to his place as redeemer. I have been asking God exactly what to do with this, as I know there may be some "advances" I will have to make.

Ruth did not ask that Boaz marry her in the sense that we would see a woman doing this today. Their culture was quite different than ours, thus we cannot force the story on our culture as a way to say that women should do the proposing. She was already in a place that it was either him or the other guy, who by the way, is not here given a name. One of them had to redeem her and the land on which she and Naomi lived. Ruth simply used her God-given beauty to call Boaz to his role as her redeemer and therefore husband.

As a woman, I have been learning lately that God has made me as beauty. I am beautiful, and that is what God will use to call my husband to be strength. I am learning more and more what it means to rejoice in the differences He has made us to exhibit, and rejoice I do. I have seen strength that allows me to be beautiful, and I have seen strength encouraged by beauty. This is what I live to be.

Ruth's act was scandalous to some modern readers, but it was the beauty of God reflected in a story of redemption.

One last side note, Ruth was known as a woman of character. She was known for the compassion and loyalty she showed to Naomi in the absence of their husbands, and she was known to be faithful. This was not just to those who knew her well, but to the whole town. My aim is to build that kind of character in my life that all who know me will see God's faithfulness in how I live my life. This will be what draws my husband, and God will make me into the beauty that He desires to have serve Him in all things.

Is God Present

Did you know that the book of Esther is the only book in the Bible where the name of God does not appear? It is. But at the same time, His presence is obvious with each turn of events. In fact, I had to rethink the first statement while I was teaching the children one morning as they wanted me to read the story of Esther to them. There are places where His presence is so obvious that in paraphrasing, it would be easy to insert His name into the text.

When I think about this, I am encouraged to think of my own life and the fact that there are days I don't so much as utter the name "Jesus," and yet I know He's been at work in my life. Then there are other times that it's so obvious that I wonder why I didn't say His name. One example of that was that yesterday I found out when I tried to withdraw funds from the ATM to pay for bowling that one of my checks had posted to my account twice, leaving insufficient funds to pull out money. I was frustrated, but there was an inner calm that said "This is not going to ruin your day." I didn't have to fight against the usual thoughts of "Great, is this how my day is going to go?" Rather, I just accepted that my day was not ruined, and in fact I bowled a 125, which doesn't sound all that much to avid bowlers, but for someone with a 70avg. this is great.

My encouragement to you today is to start thinking of how God is at work in your life. He is there, and whether or not you acknowledge Him, He is working. Let's give Him the glory today of our praise as we search out what He's called us to. "Who know but that we weren't called out for such a time as this."

A Time of Purification

Over the past week I've read the book of Esther, and I'll have at least one more post on this book, but today I want to talk about Esther chapter two.

The king of the land where Esther and Mordecai were living had banished Queen Vashti, and was now looking for a new wife and Queen. Enter Esther, whose cousin Mordecai had decided to send her with the other fair maidens of the land into the chambers for a year of purification. He had warned her not to speak of being a Jew so as to guard her and have her judged on level ground with all the other ladies.

After a whole year of myrhh and oils, and other purification items, Esther was ready to be presented to the king, who chose her above all the other maidens of the land. Some of you know the rest of the story, and that will be saved for later posts, but for now, I marvel at the time it took to prepare her for her ministry as Queen.

As I read this, and pondered what God would be saying to me, I was astounded to quickly figure out that I have entered into what could be that "year of purification." Esther had all her life been a Jew, and I'm sure taught how to live in just that way, but when it came down to it, God put the finishing touches on in a year before calling her forward. Now I don't know for certain that after this year I will be called forward into some drastic role such as Queen or anything, but I do know that for the past few months God has been starting something in me that I had no clue where it would lead. He has increased my boldness and confidence in trusting His work in my life, and some of you know, also called me to a new career path.

This weekend I was again in Colorado, and was privileged to once again have a clear place to think and listen to God's voice. It was here that I read Esther 2, and here that God confirmed for me that I should follow the dream He has placed in my heart.

My encouragement for you today is to examine what God has done in your life, praise Him for His work and presence, and seek to know what that next step should be. Who knows, but that God may have this time marked out as your purification time to prepare you for the ministry He is simultaneously preparing for you.